oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
so explain again why im purple
no
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
