You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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