yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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