how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
