It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
