im having a threesome with these popsicles
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
