I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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