its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
