ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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