Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
