So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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