I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
