let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
