just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
