Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
