why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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