I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
