I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
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