Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
