return my video game
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
