Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
