Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
