No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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