I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He better not be in your backpack
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
