i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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