He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I will be naked everywhere
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
