sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
