Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
