remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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