mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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