did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
is wine microwaveable?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
She needs sedatives and a leash
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
how does that bad decision feel?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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