Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
