I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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