is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
