Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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