Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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