at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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