My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
