Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Randomize
