apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
