living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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