in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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