You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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