Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
