i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
