Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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