I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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