He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
