its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Randomize
