Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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